The Kitchen Think

The Unfriendly Skies

I don't know what's worse:  a 12-hour car trip with my family, who has perfected the art of bickering and can't make it 2 blocks without whining or pleading for food, or flying with said family in today's unfriendly skies.

While the first involves a slow, tortuous eating-away of what patience and nerves I have left - the later involves a more thorough assault on all your senses,and can turn even the meekest traveler into a raging maniac.  And that's even before you get on the plane.

I used to feel guilty about flying with my less-than-quiet kids.  Although I've only been through two in-flight crying binges in 10 years, my 6-year old daughter tends to talk incessantly through entire cross-country flights...and my 10-year old son is a seat-kicker (not on purpose, but still....).

However, considering what all airline passengers have to deal with these days, my kids have behaved remarkably well  - sometimes better than adults - during and after stressful (that would be all) flights.  They suffer the same injustices we big people do:  canceled and delayed flights, indifferent airline personnel, seating and baggage problems, lack of food and drink, long lines and silly security rules.  The only thing they don't suffer from - yet - is the lack of leg room.

A recent OpEd in the Sunday NYTimes discussed how just one or two bad seeds could turn a flight into Romper Room at 30,000 feet....blaming such bad behavior on "parents from hell" rather than on unruly kids.

But syndicated newspaper writer Eileen Ogintz, who writes the column "Taking the Kids," says "Flying with kids is just awful now, worse than it's ever been because the hassle factor is so high."  In fact, during some of those flights from hell where passengers were stranded for hours in the plane on the runway -- parents traveling with kids were the only ones with food and entertainment for just such an emergency.

So the next time you're on an airplane with a family struggling to quiet their kids - remember:  those kids and their granola bars and Goldfish may be the only thing between you and starvation should you get stuck on the tarmac.

Share your "Kids on a Plane" story or nightmare by clicking below on "Comments" and joining the conversation.

D'oh! Nuts

I have a confession.  While the rest of the world with children in the 5 to 18 year old age bracket has been going ga-ga over Harry Potter (movie & book), my family has been completely nutty with anticipation over the big screen debut of a bunch of yellow 2-D cartoon characters with smarta--s mouths.

That's right - we're Simpsons fanatics. Bart buffs.  Homer groupies.  Marge maniacs. 

Harry versus Homer.  A therapist would have a field day with the question of why one family gravitates toward a classic coming of age story of a boy wizard who battles evil inside and outside himself.....while another is lured to the tales of a dysfunctional animated TV family who is satirical, insightful, ironic and stupid all at the same time.

Maybe it's because we see ourselves in the Simpsons rather than in the Hogwarts family.   As Homer once said, "Remember, as far as anyone knows, we're a nice normal family."

Then again, it's probably because we all love a good laugh...even if it goes way over the kids heads.   

As part of the big build-up to today's premiere of The Simpsons Movie, everybody from Vanity Fair and NPR to Entertainment Weekly and Out magazine has done pithy profiles of this 18-year old Fox series and its creators, writers, animators, dog walkers, skateboard consultants and interns.  So there's really nothing left to be said on the subject.

It's already been way over-analyzed and soon will probably become part of a Simpsons episode because no-one handles over-exposed celebrities better than The Simpsons.

I could probably blather on a bit longer.  But we've got advanced tickets to a noon showing today - part of my son's 10th birthday celebration, so we'd better get crackin' and packin'.  And "remember, you can always find East by staring directly at the sun."  Thanks, Bart. 

The Simpsons or Harry Potter?  What's your preference and why?  And what's your feeling about pink doughnuts?

The Simpsons......

Catering to Kids? Just Say No!

Just when I feared I'd been catering to my kids just a little toooo much this summer, I read about Joan Selkow of Parkland, Florida.

Ms. Selkow is a 52-year old mother of three, who recently told The NYTimes that part of her job as parent is the care, feeding and healing of her kid's virtual pets.  You read that right - virtual pets.

While her children are away at summer camp, this dedicated (if that's the word for it) parent logs on to Webkinz, a site where stuffed animals live parallel online lives, and cares for the 40 critters that her kids have bought with Kinzcash.

But it's not a simple five minute chore, as the Times explained:  "To start, she must remember the names of the Webkinz and the passwords her children use to enter their virtual homes in Webkinz World. Then she must feed them, play with them and take care of their finances. (She keeps a log of her activities, including how much cash the pets amass on the Wheel of Wow)."

Selkow says it take her about an hour a day.  And she's been doing this since June. 

I don't know about you, but this makes my slave-like behavior toward my children pale in comparison.

Call it over-parenting.  Call it hyper-parenting.  Call it obsessive.  Whatever you call it, a number of experts are now telling us that this parenting style is creating a generation of unhappy, disconnected kids who can't solve their own problems, by giving them what author and Marin County psychologist Madeline Levin calls "an impaired sense of self."

But that's old news.  What's new news is that an anthropologist at Utah State University is positing that all the time parents are spending playing Thomas the Tank Engine or Barbie with their kids really doesn't have the impact on their social and emotional growth as we once thought - and in fact, might actually play a negative role in their development.

This controversial article, recently published by USU professor David Lancy, argues that parent-child play is a distinct feature of wealthy developed countries, a result of the pressure to get kids ready for the information-age economy.  Lancy says that the data is very murky showing what, if any, benefit adult-child play actually has.  As The Boston Globe put it, "parent-child play of this sort has been virtually unheard of throughout human history...and three-fourths of the world's current population would still find that mother's behavior kind of dotty."

For all you parents who enjoy playing with their kids, don't string Lancy up the nearest play structure just yet.  He says he didn't write his article to encourage parents to stop playing with their children.  He just wants parents to stop feeling guilty when they aren't always available to play a game of Go Fish or Jenga with the kids. 

In the meantime, I'd advise Ms. Selkow (the Webkinz slave) to let those 40 virtual pets languish...and spend some quality time with herself while the kids are away at camp.

Do you cater to your kids?  Do you feel guilty when you can't/won't play that 15th game of Candyland with your 5 year old?  What do you think of the theory that parent-child play doesn't benefit children as much as previously thought?  Click below on "Comments" and share your thoughts or stories. 

Leave them kids alone
All in all it's just another brick in the wall

 

Into the Woods

All this week, my kids, my husband and I will be knee deep in dust and lake water at Camp Mather, a family camp open to San Francisco residents which is sooooo popular that families must go through a lottery process to get a spot.

Camp Mather is a place where city kids get to run wild and run free in packs, playing all day with kids their own age.  Kind of a "Lord of the Flies" thing.  There's a lake, a pool, pollywogging, crafts, volleyball, basketball, ping pong, fishing, biking, hiking, horseback riding....you name it.

Meantime, parents get to take a load off in lawn chairs reading and watching the world go by.  And the best part:  I DON'T HAVE TO COOK ANY MEALS!  Camp Mather families are fed three square meals a day in the dining "hall."  Needless to say, concerns about "No Child Left Inside" are set aside by all for at least a week.

The other great thing about Mather is that it's totally off the grid.  No cell service, no Internet, no nothin'!  Which is a round-about way of saying that I won't be posting new blogs this week. 

The beauty of the blog is that readers always have access to the archives...which I invite you to peruse in my absence.  In cast you need a little guidance, below a list with links to five of my favorite recent blogs which I invite you to enjoy.

Have a great week.  I'll be armed with my flyswatter and sun screen thinking about you.

Oogled By Google!
Is someone online watching
you?  Why zooming into
Google's new "Street View"
mapping service is turning
into a creepy experience
for countless computer
users. 

Summertime Envy
Some working parents
say summertime makes
them envious of stay-at-
home parents.  But
running Camp Mom
isn't as easy as it
sounds.

If the Shoe Fits...
Are you a shoe slave? How
much pain are your willing
to endure to have your feet
look fashionable?  And what
does all this say about you?

Paging Dr. Google, Stat!
Is the Internet the first place
you turn now when you or
someone in your family
feels sick?  Why playing
doctor isn't the safest
bet.

Money Matters for the Swing Set
Does your 12-year old want an
iPhone?  Does your 6-year old
want a digital camera?  Isn't
time these kids learned about
the value of money?

Burning Moms

In the "balance" department today, the latest headline comes to us from the Pew Research Center: "Fewer Mothers Prefer Full-Time Work."

In yet another example of a research project that spent thousands (if not millions) of dollars delving into the obvious, a new Pew survey finds that "in the span of the past decade, full-time work outside the home has lost some of its appeal to mothers," and that a growing number of women with kids say working part-time would be ideal.

Duh.  Anybody who's chatted with any mom at the office coffee machine, school drop-off, or weekend children's sports event or birthday party could have told you that.

The Pew Center researchers not only asked full-time working moms what they preferred, but also surveyed full-time stay-at-home moms (SAHMs) as well.  A whopping 60-percent of full-time working moms said they'd prefer to be working part-time, while nearly 50-percent of SAHMs said they'd like to have part-time jobs outside the house. 

So why have mother's attitudes about working changed so much in the past ten years? That's one answer you won't get from the Pew Center, because "the survey did not probe the reasons women say one work situation or another would be ideal, so it can offer no details about the way mothers see the roles of working and childrearing in their lives."

I'll take a stab at it though: there aren't enough hours in the day to do both well.  Another way to put it:  moms are burning out.

More often than not, full-time work these days consumes much more than 40-hours a week.  And just because you're not at the office, doesn't mean you're not "working," thanks to Blackberries, home computers and the Internet (damn you, technology!)  Employers will tell you that all these devices are making your job "easier," but what they're really doing is keeping you on a short leash at all times. 

However, the hours one spends "being a mom" have never changed.  Because whether you work outside the home or not, being a mother is a 24/7 gig.  While you may be slaving away in some cubicle and someone else is picking up the kids at camp, that doesn't mean you're not juggling both your job and your family.  It just means you're having to do it at a distance and often more creatively than your SAHM counterpart. 

So what, you may ask, does the Pew Research Center survey really accomplish?  It does what all our under-the-radar whining, blogging and chatting with friends cannot do:  it provides the scientific ammunition needed for change to occur within the workplace.

The Pew study forces employers to recognize that if 60-percent of today's working moms want more flexibility at work, flex-time is something they ought to be putting on their front-burners, or they face losing a significant portion of their workforce.

So although I may be cynical about conducting a study of the obvious - I'm grateful that someone is doing it.  When Pew talks...people listen.

Hey moms!  What's your ideal situation?  Working full-time, part-time, or not working at all outside the home?  Weigh in on this controversial subject, by clicking below on "Comments" and telling us what you think.

Listen to this
Everyday when I get home from work
I feel so frustrated
The boss is a jerk
And I get my sticks and go out to the shed
And I pound on that drum like it was the boss's head
Because
I don't want to work
I want to bang on the drum all day....

The Five-Second Rule (or "Quick! Grab that chip!")

I turned on one of my favorite news discussion programs on NPR yesterday, and caught them in the middle of debating "The Five-Second Rule."

Yes - I mean that "Five-Second Rule."  The unwritten law followed by kids and adults alike which says that food dropped on the floor can still be eaten, if it's picked up within five seconds.

So why, other than the fact that it's summer and a slow news day, was the five-second rule being discussed on NPR's Talk of the Nation?  A group of food research scientists at  Clemson University recently finished conducting experiments "to determine the survival and transfer of Salmonella Typhimurium from wood, tile or carpet to bologna (sausage) and bread."

Translation:  just how many germs are able to hop onto that bologna sandwich you just dropped on the floor?  It turns out, according to the Clemson study, the five-second rule does not actually prevent bacteria from creeping onto dropped balogna.

No kidding.  How many thousands of research dollars did it take to figure that out?

Both The WaPost and The NYTimes covered the Great Clemson Balogna Experiment.  The Post took a more tongue-in-cheek tact than the Times, which went as far as to suggest amending the five-second rule to include the use of an additional five seconds to think about whether or not you really want to pop that bacteria-laden chip, cookie, or balogna sandwich in your mouth.  I guess that would make it "The Ten-Second Rule."

Never-the-less, I got a lot of good information out of the NPR discussion, including these tidbits:

• The five-second rule works best when the drop-ee, or a witnessing companion, shouts "FIVE-SECOND RULE!" as soon as the edible item hits the floor.
• The rule does not apply to M&M's or Skittles, which can stay on the floor for centuries and still be eaten because of their protective candy coating.
• It does, however, apply to Mike & Ike's, especially those dropped on movie theater floors, because they have a more gelatinous coating that M&M's and Skittles.
• The pricier the dropped item, the longer you can actually allow it to stay on the floor before picking it up and consuming it.  Case in point:  the woman who took her time to slurp up the expensive champagne she had spilled on her counter top.

Another unwritten intricacy about the five-second rule, is that each household can adapt it to their particular peculiarities.  For instance because "FIVE-SECOND RULE!" could conceivably be screamed multiple times at one sitting, I limit such shout-outs to one per meal.

My kids have also amended the rule to include only foods they really, really like to eat.  So for instance, if a carrot or other vegetable drops on the floor, it is usually left there to rot or until I pick it up and throw it away.  However, if any kind of candy plummets to the parkay, it becomes "The Two-Second Rule," also known as "If You Snooze, You Loose" statute.

As WaPost writer Monica Hesse put it, "the beauty of the five-second rule is that it is utterly pliable and that it is not about food so much as it is about yearning and disgust and gastronomic history and evolutionary wiring and the implicit social contract we make when we break (and drop) bread with other human beings."

Translation:  we all need an excuse to eat stuff off the floor.

What are the specifications of "The Five-Second Rule" in your house?  Click below on "Comments" and join the conversation. 

Save Harry Potter?

If Margaret Mitchell had written "Gone With the Wind" in the Internet age, would she have caved to reader pressure and reunited Scarlett and Rhett?

I ask, because an Internet campaign is currently underway to save Harry Potter, and author J.K. Rowling reportedly is starting to weaken at the knees prior to the scheduled July 21st release of the seventh and final novel.

Rowling, as any Potter fan (or anyone who reads) can tell you, has said repeatedly that after 17 years of spinning tales about a boy wizard and his friends, "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows" is absolutely the last novel she will write in the Potter series. 

The British bookstore chain Waterstone's, which is behind the "Save Harry" movement, says on its website that "if Sherlock Holmes, Dennis Watts, Superman and Bobby Ewing can all come back from the dead, then surely reincarnation shouldn't be a problem for the world's most powerful boy wizard."  

According to Reuters, thousands have signed a petition at saveharrypotter.co.uk., urging Rowling to reverse her decision to end the Potter series with "Deathly Hallows."  The campaign started after Rowling tantalizingly told a BBC interviewer over the weekend that "I have always said I wouldn't say never.  In 10 years time, I might want to return to it."

Internet fan sites are increasingly being treated like focus groups by film makers, game developers and others who have discovered that instant access to feedback from their audience pays off in the long run.  The most recent example of this is the summer blockbuster "Transformers."

Four years ago, one of the producers of "Transformers," Don Murphy, turned a forum on his personal web site into what The NYTimes called "a rolling conversation" about the upcoming movie.  Murphy told The Times that the fans actually had some influence in script changes, design and casting.

However, it doesn't always work out so well.  Remember the Internet-driven-movie-flop Snakes on a Plane?

Back to Harry Potter, though.  It hardly matters what the result of the petition campaign will be, whether Harry dies in the end of "Deathly Hallows," or if Rowling's "never say never" interview was just a bit of p.r. wizardry prior to the book's release.

As British book blogger Jean Hannah Edelstein points out in today's Guardian Unlimited, the crusade to save Harry Potter was not started by the book's 8 to 11 year old fan base, but rather "by your friendly neighbourhood bookselling behemoth, Waterstone's," which will sorely miss the guaranteed profits from a Harry Potter 8, 9 and 10.

One-point-six million copies of "Deathly Hallows" have been pre-ordered online.  Scholastic plans a record-setting print run of 12 million copies.  And millions of movie-goers are priming themselves for the final book by jamming theaters worldwide to see the fifth film in the series, "Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix," despite not-so-good reviews like this one from The SFChronicle's Mick LaSalle.

To the book and film industry, Harry Potter means $$$.  But to the rest of us, he'll find his place with other children's classics including Alice in Wonderland, The Chronicles of Narnia and Charlotte's Web.  Because like Alice, Charlotte and Wilbur before him, Harry Potter exists in our hearts and minds - where he'll remain for generations to come.

However, I don't blame Rowling for keeping her options open.  "After all," as Scarlett memorably says, "tomorrow is another day...."

Will Rowling write another Harry Potter book?  Does Harry die in the end of "Deathly Hallows?"  Does any of this change the way you feel about the books? Click below on "Comments" and join the speculation!

So if you have a minute why don't we go,
Talk about it somewhere only we know?
This could be the end of everything.
So why don't we go, somewhere only we know,
Somewhere only we know.

 

Family "Vacation?" NOT!

By the time you get around to reading this, I'll either be winging my way to Texas - or already par-boiling in El Paso's 105-degree heat at my sister's house, gripping an ice cold Corona snuggled in a Hawaiian shirt beer buddy.

Vacation?  Some might call it that.  But honestly, any travel involving kids - particularly those like mine who never sit still - cannot technically be called "vacation."  "Family get-away" maybe.  But vacation?  NOT!

My husband happily calls it "vacation".  But he wasn't the one who was up until midnight charging the GameBoys and DSs, packing puzzle and maze books, and downloading Hannah Montana songs.  That's because on the airplane, he sits in the seat across the aisle from the three of us...reading, chatting and snoozing.  I, on the other hand, am sandwiched between the two kids, constantly pulling tricks out of my bag to prevent bickering, whining and seat-kicking.

The other passengers may think my kids are adorable and well-mannered...but it only takes one teasing incident to cause an entire plane-load of adults to turn on you.

I'm far from the only mom who doesn't consider traveling with the kids "vacation."  It's just that we usually only talk about this oxymoron among ourselves - and only with other like-thinking moms.  You see, there's a whole other group of moms out there who consider mothers like me heretics because our dream vacation involves no-one but ourselves...and maybe the husband.

A woman by the name of Jill Hudson Neal is one of those like-thinking moms.  She wrote a piece for The Washington Post recently calling family vacations "a tangy lie meant to lull you into believing that a little time away will rejuvenate your wiped-out clan. Please, it never does."

Jill - I'd love to meet you someday - and spend a little spa and bitch time away from our  families.  It sounds like we have a lot in common.

Do I feel guilty about wanting to spend my holiday away from my family?  Considering I spend nearly every waking minute with them - whatever guilt I may feel is overwhelmed by the need for a little "me" time.....which I should be getting in about  - oh - say - 14 years.

Until then, I'll have to live vicariously through this old Go Go's video...and try to catch a few winks by the pool while my sister gets a not-so-gentle reminder of why she choose not to have kids.

Vacation
All I ever wanted
Vacation
Had to get away
Vacation
Meant to be spent alone

Where do you stand on the vacationing with kids issue?  Should I be guilt-tripped, or deserving of a trip sans children?  Click below on "Comments" and share your opinions, thoughts or "vacation with kids" story.

Update
Paris Hilton had her little sit-down with Larry King last night - and although I didn't watch it I enjoyed reading this review from Washington Post media columnist Howard Kurtz this morning. 

"There were these revelations: Being in jail was scary.  The jail food was horrible.  She doesn't like being alone.  It was her lawyer's fault that she drove with a suspended license."

"It was an hour of empty calories. But America, not to mention the media, seems to keep gorging. I think King inadvertently uncovered the dirty little secret:  She's just not that interesting."

Larry moves on to more meatier matters tonight, when he interviews Colin Powell. (Tom Shales has a similarly sarcastic take on the Paris interview in the Post, too)

Tiger's Cub

I now belong to the same club as Tiger Woods.  Don't get excited, you golfers.  I don't mean some exclusive club like Augusta.  I mean the club of parenthood.

Woods wife Elin gave birth last night to a daughter, Sam Alexis Wood, less than 24 hours after dad finished second at the U.S. Open (Father's Day, no less).  "This is truly a special time in our lives and we look forward to introducing Sam to our family and friends over the next few weeks." Tiger writes on his website today.  We thank everyone for their well wishes and continued respect of our privacy."  Pictures, the site says, "will be made available shortly."

While golf fans are buzzing about his "failure" (as the SFChronicle put it Monday) to come from behind to win in his second consecutive major tournament over this past weekend, the entire sport of golf will be closely watching Woods to see how parenting changes the best player ever. 

Throughout his wife's pregnancy, Woods has been asked by intrepid sports reporters how becoming a father might affect his "job."  For you non-sports fans, Tiger is known as an almost obsessive golfer who focuses and pushes himself to perform his best every time he puts a club in his hand, whether its practice or a tournament.  It's part of what makes him such an incredible athlete. 

Asked for the millionth time this weekend how fatherhood might impact his play, Tiger said  "I don’t know what’s going to happen because I don’t know if — you know, a lot of different things can happen. Hopefully our child will be healthy, and that’s the main thing, and then I’ll figure out my playing schedule based on what’s going on with Elin and our child.  Other than that, it’s pretty much up in the air. Your guess is as good as mine."

That's probably as much as Tiger, and his $ponsor$, want to say at this point.  This is a man who has singled handedly brought billions to the sport...a massive financial investment and incentive whose mere presence at a tournament can make or break the entire event.  You can bet the PGA is holding its breath that Tiger will be a part-time dad and full-time golfer. 

Plus, golf is a notoriously sexist sport.  Changing diapers, suffering seemingly endless sleepless nights and sharing parenting duties will not go over well with the core fan base.

Under the federal Family and Medical Leave Act of 1993, most employers are required to give new moms and dads in this country 12 weeks of un-paid job protected leave following the birth of a child.  And while a majority of women take so-called maternity leave, only a smattering of men take advantage of the law, although the number has risen in recent years. 

My guess is that money is at the center of the decision made by most new dads to stay at work.  However, I don't think Tiger Woods spends too much time worrying about making ends meet.  The problem he now faces will be the intense pressure from his "employers" to stay away from home and remain on the golf circuit, especially during the bu$y $ummer $ea$on.

And while most athletes would bow to those pressures - Tiger is not most athletes.  There is a good possibility that the world's best golfer will model his parenting style after that of his parents, in particular that of his late father Earl, who showed the golf world - indeed the whole world - how inspirational an active father can be in a child's life (you can watch an Earl Woods tribute video Nike assembled on YouTube).

It will be fascinating to see how Tiger chooses to play this one.  But an inkling about where his priorities lie comes from an interview Tiger gave BunkerShot.com just four days ago, in which he said "this is far more important than any game of golf." 

Congratulations Tiger.  Welcome to my club.

Do you have any advice for Tiger on becoming a father?  What kind of balance between work and parenting do you think the best golfer in history will choose?  Click below on "Comments" and tell us what you're thinking.

Then the light begins to shine
And I hear those ancient lullabies.
And as I watch this seedling grow,
Feel my heart start to overflow.

Where do I find the words to say?
How do I teach him?
What do we play?
Bit by bit, I've realized
That's when I need them,
That's when I need my father's eyes.

Daddy Dearest?

Are dads these days misunderstood, or do they deserve the Homer-esque (Simpson, not the Iliad and Odyssey guy) treatment they get from the media and frankly, from many of us moms? 

I ask, because as I sat down to write a serious Father's Day blog for today, I found myself having trouble getting past the mental image of the dad blissfully lounging on the couch watching TV in the evening, while the mom struggles to get the kids in their PJ's, finishes up the chores, packs the backpacks for tomorrow and sends off a load of emails regarding the family's social activities.

If you've ever wished your dad was Ward Cleaver, or longed for a husband as helpful and humorous as Cliff Huxtable....apparently you are not alone.  A recent study found that in the eyes of today's kids, real dads are falling short of their TV counterparts - including even Homer Simpson. 

According to a USA Today story this week, a study of college students found that "fathers in the USA are a lot less supportive and accepting than TV sitcom dads," and that "many young people blame constant work demands - seldom portrayed on TV - for draining their fathers' energy and time from parenting."

Researchers at Marymount Manhattan College in New York showed eight sitcoms to 108 college kids and asked them to rate the TV dads compared to their real dads in areas like support, guidance, acceptance and general behavior toward other family members.  On every measure, the TV dads scored higher than the kids' real dads.

But a TV sitcom isn't real life - which is something the kids involved in the study repeatedly pointed out. And let's be honest -- although college kids may be considered on the verge of adulthood, many of them are still rebellious teenagers unable to fully grasp the pressures today's parents face. 

Although I find little value or deep meaning in this study, I suspect there's a grain of truth in it. Admittedly, dads have come a long way in the fathering department in the past 40 years.  According to the U.S. Census Bureau, the number of stay at home dads continues to grow yearly, with an estimated 159,000 men choosing to give up (paying) work and stay at home with the kids.  And because the number of working couples has increased exponentially in the past four decades - men have had to increase their share of the parenting out of necessity.

And while we know how important a mother's love and nurturing plays in the development of a child...respected Wall Street Journal Work and Family columnist Sue Shellenbarger reports that "fathers can have a distinct impact on children beyond that of mothers, and in many cases without regard to the fact that they often spend less time with their kids" according to an increasing body of evidence.

Yet our stereotypical perceptions of dads dictate - for instance - how they spend their Father's Day.  While on Mother's Day, most moms are awarded "alone time" as far away from their kids as possible (manicures, pedicures and book store browsing), on Father's Day, dad get just the opposite:  picnics, park trips and pool duty with the whole family. 

Face it.  Dads are still spending less time with their kids than moms are. What better way to  "honor" him on Sunday than to let him play "mom."  Perhaps I should save a chore or two for him to do, too.........

Do you think dads these days are getting a bad rap?  What are you doing for your dad or husband this Father's Day?  Click below on "Comments" and tell us what you're thinking.

I'll be your Tarzan, you'll be my Jane
I'll keep you warm and you'll keep me sane
And well sit in the trees and eat bananas all day
Just like an ape man