Steve Jobs ought to be ashamed of himself.
He and his brilliantly evil marketing wizards have completely convinced my tweener son, his friends, their friends, their friends friends, and most of their parents - that life will not be complete unless they own an iPhone.
If it weren't for the fact that this highly anticipated electronic device costs $499 - along with the problematic reality that he's a little scared of crowds in the dark (plus - I'd never let him) - my son would probably be camping out with all the CraigsListed line-holders (with a going rate of $1000) and other phone-atics who are currently warming sidewalks at AT&T stores across the globe.
The hype is so huge - the frenzy so great - that even the late breaking news from AT&T that iPhone service plans will range from a mid-level $59.99 to a downright pricey $99.99 month, have failed to curb the enthusiasm (although shareholders were far from thrilled, driving Apple stock down a few points yesterday).
The concerns voiced by well-respected techie skeptics about the iPhone's smallish touch-sensitive screen, its speed, its not-replaceable-by-the-user battery, and its price - are no match for the Death Star that is the Apple marketing team. No child, no adult is safe from the Buzz Machine.
The only way Steve Jobs can pay back his debt to society for this clever assault on our senses and sensibilities - is to start using his marketing team for the greater good.
After the iPhone roll-out this Friday, put them to work selling fitness to our fat masses...healthy foods to our junk-addicted population...crucial school bonds to a taxed out public...heck - why not throw in immigration reform, a new national health care plan, even an Iraq war exit plan.
I mean, this is a man who could make kids crave vegetables with just a well-produced 20-minute online video that turns them into Pavlov's dogs when they see anything green on their plates.
Just put Jobs on the job, and you've got a line around the block for iBroccoli.
In the meantime though, we're just going to have to settle for the coolest phone ever.
Now it's your turn to weigh in on the iPhone frenzy. Click below on "Comments" and give us your perspective on the iPhone and its indispensable buzz machine.
"I want you all to stop focusing on the iRack, and start focusing on the iRan...."
For some more reviews of the iPhone, read "11 iPhone Gotchas" in today's WaPost, "Matching the Ballyhoo, Mostly" in today's NYTimes, or listen/download "The iPhone Cometh" on today's Talk of the Nation on NPR.